Have you seen the movie In Good Company? It's a favorite of ours around here (well C and I anyway) and we frequently refer to a particular exchange between two of the characters. One (Carter Duryea) is a young 'superstar' that comes into Dan Foreman's company and replaces many of the older employees. As he starts his new position he's in the process of a divorce; the implication seems to be that the marriage didn't last long. At one point Carter engages Dan in a conversation about marriage:
Carter Duryea: Dan, you seem to have the perfect marriage. How do you do it?
Dan Foreman: You just pick the right one to be in the foxhole with, and then when you're outside of the foxhole you keep your dick in your pants.
Carter Duryea: That's poetic.
It's a little crude, sure, and keeping my "d*ck in my pants" is not something I've ever particularly worried about in making my marriage a success. It's the first part that I identify with..."pick the right one to be in the foxhole with."
10 years ago today Chris and I stepped over the threshold into the foxhole of our marriage. It seems nearly impossible to believe in so many ways. I can't believe we were such relative babies when we got married. I can't believe that we met under such improbable circumstances and had the faith to stay committed through some difficult obstacles. I can't believe how many challenges we've faced together and how much the vast majority of those struggles have strengthened and cemented our relationship. And yet, I think both of us, if asked, would prefer to focus more on the significant number of lucky breaks we've had along the way. We are fortunate to have the family and friends we do, fortunate to have had the opportunity to build this little family of ours.
Being married takes work, for sure. It seems crazy sometimes that our culture considers it normal for two people, often from wildly different backgrounds and at a young age, to commit to one another through the various phases of life, encountering any manner of unexpected bumps along the way. I don't take our relationship for granted, and I continue to vow, as I did 10 years ago, to hang in there through the rough parts and enjoy the good ones, however mundane they may be.
Here's to many more decades together in our foxhole, honey. Happy 10th anniversary!