WDSD 2013

I don't always love Down syndrome. I don't always know what the hell I'm doing with my own kid, let alone how to interact with other children and (especially) adults with Ds. I was unfortunately not delivered of any special Super Mom Powers when Pacey popped out to say hello 2.5 months early.

But my god do I love this kid. I wouldn't change him or the way he's enriched my life and my relationships for anything.

Today I'm doing my best to celebrate all the things about him, whether they have anything to do with Down syndrome or not. Happy World Down Syndrome Day.

Phone Dump

Huff - best, most tolerant dog ever

"Mom, we're frogs!!"

Elephant family in the bath

View of her chauffer from the backseat

I love stuff like this from school

Hard at work repairing our hot tub heater. Seriously
useful having a husband who knows how to fix just
about anything.

The u/s tech genuinely seemed to think this picture was
adorable. I mean, yeah, mother's love and all that but
that is a straight-up SKELETON!

Soaking up Vitamin D wherever we can get it (this was in
a bedroom of the house we looked at last
weekend)

Sleepy Girl sleeps sitting up

Happy spring my ass

Quick Takes

* We're getting closer to a decision on whether we are going to put our house on the market again or begin construction to add two more bedrooms and stay put. There are a confounding number of variables that are going into the decision, hence why it hasn't been made yet. We saw just about the perfect property come on the market yesterday, unfortunately too soon for us to be in a place to put an offer in (and it will be gone before we are ready). It was nice to see something worthy come on though, because there's a SERIOUS lack of inventory in our area, similar to many other areas in the country right now. Anyway, we should get the remaining data we need to make a decision hopefully by the end of the week. One way or another, changes are a-coming.

* I attended Pacey's spring conference at school on Friday and came away feeling so good. He's progressing really well and I just cannot say enough about what a great team of people we are working with. We are in the process of scheduling a meeting in the next few weeks to get ourselves all on the same page before we do his IEP in May. In the meantime, we are planning a few ways to increase his independence before the end of the year which, selfishly, will make my life a little easier. I'm conscious that while I'm keen to be involved and support his educational process however I can, I also don't want to be overbearing and get in the way of his being independent. Anyway, the conference came at a great time because I've been feeling overwhelmed and discouraged in light of some challenging behaviors with him lately. I keep sitting down to write about it but I just don't quite know what I want to write. I mentioned to a fellow parent lately that while the first few years of parenting a child with special needs has its own challenges, I feel like as your kid gets older things get more complex and the challenges can be more emotionally and mentally taxing.

* Brighton continues to be maddening, entertaining and completely irresistible in equal parts. She has become weirdly accident-prone lately, which combined with a few unusual afternoon naps leads me to believe she may be undergoing a growth spurt. Unfortunately her accidents have led to several facial injuries so, well, let's just say we opted out of spring school photos. Chris has been working with her on some basic addition and she is showing an aptitude for and, more importantly, a real interest in numbers. He's geekily thrilled.

* I think I mentioned that I dropped our iPad and shattered the screen. It took me a few days to bring myself to send it off for repair so only got around to it on Friday. We are currently on our fourth iPad-less day and Pacey is in serious withdrawal. When I reminded him yesterday that iPad was "at the doctor," he retrieved an Amazon box that was waiting to be broken down and recycled, got inside and politely requested that I send him along after the iPad.

* I didn't take a 21-week belly picture, but rest assured things are all still happening and growing, etc etc. I maintained my personal tradition of exposing my fetuses to paint fumes nice and early by painting our master bathroom (hey, someone has to take over my position as Master Painter, might as well get it into their blood ASAP). I feel a lot of kicking and wriggling but my recent ultrasound showed an anterior placenta so it will likely be a little while until Chris or the kids can feel the movement from the outside. I still sort of suck at being pregnant (the amount of general whining and complaining I do is pretty uncharacteristic for me), but I feel like I've grown into a pretty ok mom so I'm looking forward to getting through the next four months and into more gratifying territory. My belly has grown enough to comfortably rest a small bowl of ice cream upon, so there is that.

* It snowed several inches this morning and is due to be no more than 20 degrees for the next three days. This is...unacceptable. We are all well and truly done with winter - even Chris now that the fishing season has ended for most of the fish varieties.

* In order to write this post I just invented a seriously genius activity for the kids. I am sending them off with my phone camera to take photos of various groups of things. The options are endless....color groups, shapes, textures, patterns, objects that start with certain letters, etc. And I am alternately specifying that they look upstairs and then downstairs so they are running all over, burning off a little energy in the meantime. Win.

A Few Questions

I saw this over on Navigating the Mothership and I thought it might be a good prompt to get the writing juices flowing again.

1. What were you doing 10 years ago?

Ten years ago this month I was getting ready to get married (wedding was April 26, 2003). I was working in the radiology department at a private hospital in Chichester, England, where I was given far more responsibility than was probably legit for someone with no official training. My sister was taking care of most of the wedding details in California and I was focused on looking gorgeous (regular gymming, fake-tanning (I KNOW)) and pinching pennies to cover our expenses to travel over for the wedding. We lived in a tiny one-bedroom flat with no actual heating beyond little space heaters. We frequently resorted to running the ancient tumble-dryer even without clothes in it because it contributed some heat to the living space. We were pretty close to broke all the time and it was stressful planning a wedding from far away but mostly I remember that being a pretty darn carefree and fun time in life (whether I realized it then or not).

2. What are five things on your To-Do List?

I'm going more with Life Goals for this, as opposed to Boring Shit I Need to Get Done This Week.

- Fundraise for and complete a 3-day walk for breast cancer.

- Get another tattoo that represents my family in an abstract way.

- Take some photography classes and offer, probably on a volunteer basis, photo sessions specifically for children with special needs and their families.

- Go on family trips to Alaska, France, Germany and England to show our kids all the places that shaped their parents, both as individuals and as a couple.

- Take a solo trip with each of my kids to a place of their choosing (within reason).

3. What are five snacks you enjoy?

- Apples and peanut butter
- Shelled pistachios
- Tortilla chips and hot salsa
- Pretzels
- Triscuits

4. Name some things you would do if you were a millionaire:

- Pay off our mortgage and student loans
- Purchase a house large enough to accomodate Pacey and several other young adults/adults with special needs to form a "group home" of sorts.
- Encourage my husband to start his own business
- Buy a home for my parents here in the Twin Cities, to be occupied as often as they wanted
- Finally get over my inability to spend lots of money on nice clothes for myself

5. Name some places you've lived:

- Anchorage, Alaska
- Chichester, England
- Brighton, England
- Pasadena, California
- Outside Minneapolis, MN

6. Name some bad habits you have:

Biting nails/picking cuticles, grinding my teeth, leaving cupboards and drawers slightly ajar, letting my kids watch iPad while they eat so they will just SIT DOWN FTLOG AND EAT

7. Name some jobs you've had:

- Medical records clerk (after-school and summers through high school and college)
- Cook/cashier/server/janitor at a cafe (work-study during college)
- Radiology Assistant
- Publicist for a publishing company
- Temp at Yahoo
- Claims investigator for a medical malpractice insurance company

Neglected (20 Weeks)

It's been hard to feel inspired to write lately. I hit kind of a wall with winter and being pregnant and a difficult phase with one of my children. Sometimes it's therapeutic to come and vent, but hasn't felt that way lately. Anyway, I plan to be back later with a real post, but for now here's my 20 week picture. I'm dressed to work out because I....actually worked out. For the first time since getting pregnant. I hate admitting that, but I'm a terrible exerciser when pregnant. I have no qualms about admitting that my main motivation for working out is looking better and, well, it's only going one direction right now. But, it was great for my mental well-being and that's enough so I have a standing weekly date at the gym with a friend now.

Back later...

Ice Castles

I think it's pretty obvious (it will be to me when I look back) that this winter has been a trying one. I have had neither the energy nor the motivation to do much in the way of outdoor activities, and frankly the weather hasn't been all that conducive this year. We were floundering for something to do yesterday afternoon, though, and I remembered that a friend had mentioned the Ice Castle made from icicles outside the Mall of America. The weather was stunning yesterday so I talked my crowd-averse husband into a family excursion. It turned out to be great. Potentially not quite worth the price of admission, but then that is always relative when it comes to activities involving kids. I think the structures had probably done some decent melting over the last week, but they were still pretty darn cool.

This man is a giant sucker for his boy

View from inside

Awwwwwwww

You can't really see it, but there's a heart carved into the snow behind us :)

After the kids had had their fill of running around we were tired of chasing the kids around, we went to a well-known local place for ice cream. The kids were surprisingly well-behaved and I got to fulfill a craving with some mandarin orange-chocolate chip ice cream. And then on the way to the car Pacey fell and scraped his hands on icy snow, Brighton got told off for jacking around too near the street and both kids ended the adventure in tears - as all good outings with young kids do.

19 Weeks

Me and my best girlfriend, S. As of this picture she was three weeks away from her scheduled c-section date (jealous). I've never had a pregnant-buddy before...I can highly recommend it. I'm sad that it has never worked out for my sister and I to be pregnant together, but this is the next best thing. She seems so much further ahead now, but our boys will only be four months apart. Can't wait to meet him!